This was easily the hardest TV schedule I’ve ever had to put together.  I actually thought I was going to be watching less television than ever but then I got to Thursday.  Thank God for Hulu and bittorrent, otherwise I don’t know what I’d do*.

First let’s say goodbye to the shows that won’t be returning from the last schedule:

• Cupid (although I thought it sucked)
• Life on Mars (gave up on it)
• Kings (too complicated for a non sci-fi show)
• Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles (it was weak at times but damn, did it close strong)
• Battlestar Galactica (One of the greatest sci-fi shows of all-time and look forward to the day that the complete series is on Amazon Gold Box)
• My Name Is Earl (don’t know how it lasted as long as it did)

Thanks to the geniuses at NBC, Fox and ABC, I have to make a separate list for shows I’ll be watching via in the Internet.

New shows in blue

Sunday (2.5 hours):

8:00 – 8:30 PM: The Simpsons (FOX)
8:30 – 9:00 PM: The Cleveland Show (FOX) -  Hopefully this is more Family Guy (seasons 1-3) and less Family Guy (the rest)
9:00 – 9:30 PM: Family Guy (FOX) – I’m finally doing away with Desperate Housewives.  I don’t even know why I watched it for so long.
9:00- 9:30 PM: Curb Your Enthusiasm (HBO)
9:30 – 10:00 PM: Bored to Death (HBO) – It stars Jason Schwartzman, Ted Danson and Zach Galifianakis.  How can this NOT work**?

Monday (4 hours):

8:00 – 9:00 PM: House (FOX) – I’ve always been afraid to let go of Heroes in case they ever got their act together. It’s like having one great night with a girl and staying in a three year relationship with her on the strength of it. I still may drunk dial Heroes via Hulu.
8:00 – 8:30 PM: How I Met Your Mother (CBS)
9:00 – 10:00 PM: Gossip Girl (CW)
9:30 – 10:00 PM: The Big Bang Theory (CBS)
10:00 – 11:00 PM:Castle(ABC) – Let’s be honest.  This is the last season.

Tuesday (5 hours):

8:00 – 10:00 PM: So You Think You Can Dance (FOX) – This better improve upon the subpar summer season considering it’s screwing up my TV schedule
8:00 – 9:00 PM: 90210 (CW) until 11/3 then V (ABC) – I accept that 90210 is awful but that’s why it’s a guilty pleasure (more emphasis on “guilty”) but if a remake of V, it’s done for. 1) Watching V when I was a kid (yes, I’m that old) is one of my most vivid television watching memories and 2) it stars Elizabeth Mitchell (Lost) and Morena Baccarin (Firefly/Serenity)
10:00 – 11:00 PM: Sons of Anarchy (FX) – I was down on this show in the beginning and almost dropped it a couple of times but by the end it was one of my favorite shows on TV.  You should definitely watch it (so I can IM you about it on Wednesday morning and you can make my work day a little more interesting).

Wednesday (3.5 hours):

8:00 – 9:00 PM: So You Think You Can Dance (FOX)
9:00 – 10:00 PM: Glee (FOX) – I just feel like this show is going to make me happy every time I watch it.
9:00 – 9:30 PM: Modern Family (ABC) This is one of the few comedy pilots that interested me
10:00 – 11:00 PM: Nip/Tuck (FX) – The beginning of the end.

Thursday (5.5 hours):

8:00 – 9:00 PM: Bones (FOX) – I really wanted to watch FlashForward live but I love Bones.
8:00-9:00 PM: FlashForward (ABC) – Why is Joseph Fiennes slumming on network television?
9:00 – 10:00 PM: Fringe (FOX) – What the hell is Fox thinking putting a second year show up against Grey’s Anatomy? Are they trying to get this show canceled?  This was a tough call but the absence of George in Grey’s and the presence of Jasika in Fringe made the difference.
9:00 – 9:30 PM: The Office (NBC)
9:30 – 10:00 PM: Community until 10/15 then 30 Rock (NBC): After watching the pilot on Facebook, I definitely want to see Community. Wait…does this mean Joel McHale isn’t doing The Soup? If so, I pray for this shows cancellation.
10:00 – 11:00 PM: The Mentalist (CBS) – At least now I have a semi-legitimate reason to drop Private Practice besides the fact that it was Private Practice.
10:00 – 10:30 PM:It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FX) –Wildcard, bitches!

Friday (2 hours):

9:00 – 10:00 PM: Ugly Betty (ABC) – Well, now that’s it’s on Friday and can watch what’s likely to be it’s final season
9:00 – 10:00 PM:Dollhouse (FOX) – Fingers crossed for a role for the now-unemployed Summer Glau

Saturday (1.5 hours):

11:30 PM – 1:00 AM: Saturday Night Live (NBC)

23 live/DVR hours total

Shows I will be watching on the Internet:

• Dexter (SHO)
• Greek (ABC FAM) – You win Pam, Seth and Mark
• Heroes (NBC) – Just out of curiosity
• SNL Weekend Update Thursday until 10/15 then Community (NBC): Um, the election is over. What the hell is Seth going to talk about? He barely got through the updates on Saturday post-Sarah Palin.
• Parks and Recreation (NBC): This show was hit or miss but so was The Office in the first season.  Hey, anything is an improvement over Kath & Kim
• Grey’s Anatomy (ABC) – Why couldn’t it be Izzie?

5 hours total

That leaves me at 29 hours of TV this fall.  Which is actually down from 29.5 last mid season. Thank God I don’t have to burden a girlfriend or a child with this nonsense.

*  I mean from the obvious like “read a book”, “get a girlfriend”, “go outisde”, “live a life”
** Famous last words