Tag Archives: Comic Books

Superf*cker

Posted on by
1

It’s impossible. Lois could never have Superman’s baby. Do you think her fallopian tubes could handle the sperm? I guarantee you he blows a load like a shotgun right through her back. What about her womb? Do you think it’s strong enough to carry his child?…He’s an alien, for Christ’s sake. His Kryptonian biological makeup is enhanced by Earth’s yellow sun. If Lois gets a tan the kid could kick right through her stomach. Only someone like Wonder Woman has a strong enough uterus to carry his kid. The only way he could bang regular chicks is with a kryptonite condom. But that would kill him.
- Brodie from Mallrats

I think the only reason DC has finally decided to couple Superman and Wonder Woman in continuity (it’s happened plenty of times in Elseworlds tales) is they can finally show Superman as a sexual being. The only time I can recall that Superman had sex with Lois in the comics was during Brian Azzarello/Jim Lee’s brief “For Tomorrow” arc (at least it was implied. Who knows what really happened?). As silly as Brodie’s line was in Mallrats, every comic book geek has discussed the illogical nature of Superman and Lois having sex.

Now we can have tasteful superhero sex in the New 52 like Batman and Catwoman.

Yay?

When Minor Characters Do Major Things

Posted on by
1

20120601-091155.jpg

A few weeks ago, DC Comics announced that a major character was going to be reintroduced as gay. So comic fans speculated which major character it was going to be. I thought it should be Captain Marvel because he didn’t really have any serious romantic entanglements in the previous continuity (ignoring for a second that he’s really a pre-teen but that might have made it more awesome and influential).

It was revealed this week that the now gay character is Alan Scott. If you just said, “who?”, I rest my case. Scott is DC’s original Green Lantern (before they came up with the Guardians, Oa and the entire mythology that spawned Hal Jordan) and was a member of Justice Society of America. This is HARDLY a major character. Adding insult to injury, Scott is going to be in Earth-2 so he’s not even in the current continuity that the average person is aware of. Why couldn’t it have been Martian Manhunter, one of the Robins or one of the more recognizable Green Lanterns like Kyle Rayner or John Stewart? It’s great that DC is adding a LGBT character but given the fanfare, I wanted more. This was just too safe.

DC Comics already has gay characters – Batwoman/Kate Kane, Renee Montoya/The Question, Obsidian (coincidentally Alan Scott’s son from the previous continuity) – so one more shouldn’t be a big deal (actually they could use a few more). DC Comics trying to ride the wave of Obama coming out in support of gay marriages to try and push a few more issues.

Continue reading →

Who Watches Before Watchmen?

Posted on by
Reply

I’ve been meaning to write about what a horrible idea I thought DC releasing prequels to Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons’ classic work, Watchmen, prequels NOT written by Moore (although they did ask him while offering him back the rights to Watchmen that had been denied to him for so long).

DC isn’t stupid. They know no one would accept this even a little bit unless the writers and artists behind this weren’t the best of the best. As much as I hate that this is happening, I would read anything by Brian Azzarello, J. G. Jones and Darwyn Cooke (J. Michael Straczynski…not so much).

The reason this seems like such a bad idea is Moore crafted such a detailed tale that there’s no room for expansion. Between the flashbacks and the supplemental pieces, we know everything we need to know about these characters. All these comics could possibly do is illustrate stories mentioned in the supplemental materials or flesh out stories described or mentioned by characters. It all seems like a pretty obvious cash grab on a known respected property by DC Comics.

Well, not as obvious as this Watchmen toaster.

Yes, that’s really happening.

Maybe this cartoon isn’t that far off from the truth.

Thoughts on ‘The Avengers’ trailer

Posted on by
2
  • I’m not a fan of Captain America’s  (Chris Evans) new suit.  Thor’s (Chris Hemsworth) new suit isn’t much better.
  • Apparently Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson) only knows one move (the neck flip).
  • I hope the movie makes Black Widow and Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) seem useful
  • Robert Downey, Jr. gets all the best lines.  He seems like a great fit for a Joss Whedon movie.
  • Best part of the trailer:
    Captain America:  ”Big man in a suit of armor.  Take that away, what are you?”
    Iron Man: “Uh. Genius.  Billionaire. Playboy. Philanthropist.”
  • Nine Inch Nails’ “We’re In This Together.” Interesting yet a little on the nose.
  • It goes without saying, I can’t wait for this movie.

With Great Responsibility…

Posted on by
2

Revealed in Marvel Comics’ Ultimate Fallout Issue 4, out Wednesday, the new Spider-Man in the Ultimate universe is a half-black, half-Hispanic teen named Miles Morales. He takes over the gig held by Peter Parker, who was killed in Ultimate Spider-Man Issue 160 in June.[1]

When I got to work this morning and first read about the new Spider-Man, I didn’t really care.  It was in the Ultimate Universe (which is kind if a mess right now) and not in regular continuity. Sure, it gets Marvel some press which Marvel never gets tired of.  I was going to read it since I’ve read every issue of Ultimate Spider-Man to this point.

The more I thought about it, the happier it made me.  I started imagining sharing this comic with my future mixed children.  I smiled at the thought that they would have a superhero who might look like them and have a similar background as them.  I was already daydreaming of one of my kids wanting to dress up as Spider-Man for Halloween but not Peter Parker, “the brown one”.

Even though this probably won’t last too long (NO ONE stays dead in comic books), I plan to buy every trade paperback of this comic so I can show it to them and explain that, for a brief period,  a kid like you was Spider-Man.

I really wish he didn’t look like teenage Obama though.  That’s just lazy.

1. Truitt, Brian (08-02-2011). “Half-black, half-Hispanic Spider-Man revealed.” USA Today.

Links for January 21-22

Posted on by
2

Well, doing the daily links became too much so I’m just going to do my top 10 links at the end of the week but here are a few from the last few days.

Links for January 11th

Posted on by
Reply