Movie of the Week: X-Men: The Last Stand

Sigh…

I’ll be honest, after I left the theater, I wanted to give the movie but after telling my friend about the movie I had to admit that there were some cool parts.

I don’t know what to say about this movie. This wasn’t Brett Ratner’s fault. He did a competent job. There were some scenes that were better than anything in the first two X-Men movies. The Phoenix scenes were handled particularly well.

Whoever decided that this movie should only be 107 minutes not only ruined this movie but ruined this franchise.

It was clear that the writers of the movie had been given a list of things to address:

  • Jean/Phoenix
  • The cure storyline
  • Give Storm a bigger role
  • Solve the Cyclops-doesn’t-really-do-anything problem
  • Iceman vs. Pyro
  • Introduce a bunch of new mutants (Angel, Beast, Callisto, Madrox)
  • Give Colossus something to do
  • Iceman/Rogue/Kitty Pryde love triangle
  • Jean/Cyclops/Logan love triangle

And they were told to do all this in 107 minutes or less because even with the short running time, there managed to be filler.

There was a lot of potential. The cure story could have been cool. The Phoenix story could have been cool. The use of the next generation of X-Men stepping up could have been cool. But instead of there being a main plot and some subplots, there were ONLY subplots, some being resolved, some being forgotten and some rushed to an unsatisfying conclusion. And because of that, I felt detached from the whole movie.

It’s sad. Given an extra 45-60 minutes and a better writer, this could have been the best of the X-Men movies.

Click “Read More” for spoilers.

  • One of the things that I did not like about the franchise as a whole was the relationship between Magneto and Xavier. At first, when Xavier was killed by Phoenix right in front of Magneto, I was mad because Magneto would not stand for his best friend being killed. But he got over it pretty quick. Only after I left the theater did it occur to me that Magneto has endangered his “friend’s” life in each movie.
  • I think it’s pretty pathetic that instead of actually giving Cyclops something to do in this movie, they killed him off. Not only that, they did it so unceremoniously that even though he died before Xavier, he never got a funeral or a tombstone. Nothing until the end. This should have been his movie seeing his wife was the main villain. It should have been Cyclops reaching through to her, appealing to her good side, not LOGAN. Then again, Cyclops wasn’t getting a solo movie.
  • Well, Halle, you got a bigger role. Too bad you didn’t do anything with it.
  • Did the two women of color HAVE TO fight each other? Seriously.
  • Did Juggernaut HAVE TO say “I’m the Juggernaut, bitch” like that YouTube cartoon?
  • It was a shame that the second best character in the franchise, Mystique, was taken out of play so soon.
  • Beast didn’t look that bad. But his fighting did.
  • Magneto. Next time, just take a fucking boat to Alcatraz.
  • I don’t understand why Angel is on all the movie posters. HE ONLY HAD THREE SCENES AND FOUR LINES?
  • I guess the guy playing Colossus can’t act because they gave him as little to do without being considered an extra.
  • Iceman finally “icing out” was cool..Although it looked stupid. Shame on you, WETA Digital. That was the best you can do.
  • The whole Rogue going for the cure could have been dealt with better.
  • Dania Ramirez. Hi there. My name is Sean. Can I buy you a drink?

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