Yeah, I Was In The Shit

So I finally playing Paintball yesterday. I don’t think I can expect a call from Jack Bauer anytime soon.

First game, we played, I was the first man taken out. I got better though.

For some reason, there was a Filipino paintball team there “practicing” for a tournament. They did not look like a paintball team. They looked like a tactical unit. I keep scanning the paper or the internet for a report of an incredibly organized assault team attacking the White House.

Anyway, because there were so many of them, it was essentially the Filipino assassins vs. everybody else. Guess who won? Actually, we held our own more times than not but they eventually won. Later we found out they were cheating because their guns were too powerful (the max velocity for the field was 280fps and some of their guns clocked at 375fps once the issue was raised).

I only have one bruise and it’s from our last game. I raised my arm to say I was out and as I was walking off the field, some little fucker shot me under the arm.

I always fucked up my left knee by trying to leap over some rocks to get to cover. It looked a lot shorter than it was. My right leg cleared. My left leg, not so much. Then I made it worse in the last game. I was trying to run for cover and I stumbled on some sand. To prevent myself from falling on my face, I went into a great front roll and landed upright. I wish someone had it on tape.

I spent the rest of the night with an ice pack on my knees.


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