100 Opinions I Hold That Are Open To Discussion

Feel free to disagree with me but I think…

  1. …MTV with their reality based programming is destroying the brains of young white girls everywhere.
  2. …BET is matching them step for step on destroying the brain of young African-Americans.
  3. …The only positive thing about the current state of hip-hop is that any kid now thinks he can be a rapper because bar has been lowered so low for what constitutes a “good song.” It’s nice to have dreams.
  4. Lost is better than Heroes and it’s damn near insulting to compare the two.
  5. …It’s nice to support your team and all but until the Mets win at least two more World Series, Mets fans really shouldn’t say shit about the Yankees.
  6. …The reason Batman resonates with fans more than Spider-Man and Superman is because he has no powers therefore creating the belief that, however unrealistic, with an unlimited bank account and near psychotic levels of training and dedication, you too can be Batman.
  7. …Women are generally smarter than men when it comes to matters of the heart. So much smarter that they end up out thinking themselves underestimating how dumb a guy can be.
  8. …You can track the decline of society by watching every season of MTV’s The Real World in chronological order.
  9. …YouTube and WikiPedia are the two greatest things to happen to cubicle drones.
  10. …Tabloids are destroying what little intelligence the Western World has.
  11. …Men and women both get complacent in long-term relationships and stop doing the cute things that they did in the beginning of the relationships. Women just say something about it.
  12. …Guys love “bitches” almost as much as girls love “bad boys”.
  13. …People don’t change. They just learn to accept things.
  14. …The reason some guys can’t commit a relationship is they are always thinking about what else they can be doing. It’s like being a quarterback. One receiver is WIDE OPEN but you still check your other receivers to see if you can slip a pass in there.
  15. …When you are in the early stages of a relationship, it makes you blind to certain things. Most notably, how ridiculously you are acting in public.
  16. …No one can remember when they stopped making out with their significant other.
  17. …If Joey ended up with anyone, she should have ended up with Dawson, not Pacey. It was DAWSON’S CREEK not Pacey’s Pond.
  18. The Matrix was not intended to be a trilogy. The Wachowski Brothers lied to get more money.
  19. …The only friends worth keeping are the ones you can not talk to for long periods of time and nothing changes.
  20. …Going out to clubs is overrated.
  21. …Before you buy your favorite sports player’s jersey, check out the terms of his contract with his team. Even then, it’s still a short term investment.
  22. …Facebook is better than MySpace because the design is the same for every page. MySpace was ruined when they let members add songs and change the design.
  23. …”The Takeover” was better than “Ether” because Jay-Z dissed Nas from the perspective of a fan while Nas, while making a few valid digs, resorted to calling him “ugly” and “gay.”
  24. …Denzel Washington shouldn’t have won an Oscar for Training Day. He should have won it for Malcolm X.
  25. …It’s a travesty that America doesn’t have universal health care.
  26. …Carrie ending up with Big after everything he did to her over the course of the series gave all men hope that as long as she loves you, you still have a chance.
  27. …Women’s shoes are designed to be comfortable to walk in for 10 minutes tops. That’s how long it will take for them to decide to buy the shoe. Then they’re proper fucked.
  28. …Guys don’t ask other guys for advice on their relationships.
  29. …Paris Hilton is the most influential person in the last five years. She redefined (read: lowered the standard) for “celebrity” and was the harbinger of doom for the media.
  30. …Protests and petitions don’t change anything.
  31. …The biggest mistake Marvel Comics made was bringing Jean Grey back from the dead.
  32. …The top three Not Ready For Prime Time Players were Bill Murray, Phil Hartman & Gilda Radner.
  33. …Spike Lee uses the movies to see the breast of actresses he finds attractive.
  34. …Female bartending is the most sexually discriminating job next to stripper. But at least there are fat, ugly strippers. If there’s a fat,ugly bartender, she’s is the owner or having sex with him.
  35. …George Lucas was lying when he said he intended Star Wars to have nine parts. He made it up as he went along.
  36. …You shouldn’t be watching MTV programming if you are over the age of 30.
  37. …”Cancer” should never be used as a metaphor.
  38. …Women should spend more money on their significant others and not just for gift-giving holidays and birthdays. It’s only fair.
  39. Road House is the greatest B-movie ever made.
  40. …Every third movie of a Marvel film franchise has sucked.
  41. Batman The Animated Series was the best cartoon based on a comic book character.
  42. …R&B songs are boring when you aren’t in a relationship or reminiscing on one.
  43. …Brad Pitt’s best role was 12 Monkeys.
  44. …Movies are too long these days.
  45. Arrested Development (the TV show, not the hip-hop group) was ahead of its time.
  46. 24 is right wing propaganda.
  47. Love Actually is the best romantic comedy of the last five years.
  48. …The New York Giants will never win a Super Bowl with Eli Manning at quarterback.
  49. …Technology is getting everyone to the point of never having to leave your house. The last step will be a video cell phone (meaning you can see the person you are talking to).
  50. …”Douche” as an insult is in the midst of a renaissance.
  51. …People who think they are special because they don’t want an iPod are douches.
  52. …Duke should have died in G.I. Joe The Movie.
  53. …People who talk during movies should be sterilized.
  54. …Parenting classes should be given alongside Lamaze classes.
  55. …They shouldn’t have made a trilogy out of Pirates of the Carribean.
  56. Die Hard is the greatest action movie ever.
  57. …Tony Soprano was killed.
  58. …The Rock was the best wrestler in the last 20 years.
  59. …Val Klimer was a pretty good Batman but he sucked as Bruce Wayne because he spoke in the same tone.
  60. Dream On was a more realistic depiction of dating in New York City than Sex & The City.
  61. …Carrie was given a second chance with Aidan so he could be somewhat vilified and Carrie can recover some of the likability she lost when she cheated on him.
  62. …Will Ferrell, while appearing in a number of really bad movies, is incapable of not being funny.
  63. …Adam Sandler has only tried to act in four movies – The Wedding Singer, Punch Drunk Love, Spanglish & Reign Over Me.
  64. …Sega Genesis was a better machine that the Nintendo 64 but Nintendo had the 3rd party support.
  65. …Mary J. Blige has one dance step. She should really try to stand still when she sings.
  66. High Fidelity is the closest we’ve come to “Bro Flick” (as opposed to a “Chick Flick”)
  67. …Living a long boring life is the worst way to die, followed closely by drowning and suffocating.
  68. …If your ass crack shows when you bend over, your jeans do not fit. Take them off and change into something more appropriate.
  69. …It is impossible for a guy not to stare at cleavage at least once. If you don’t notice, it means he got his fill while you weren’t paying attention.
  70. Chappelle’s Show was funnier than The Chris Rock Show but Chris Rock is a better stand-up comedian.
  71. …Racism will never end.
  72. …Three greatest comic strips of all-time: The Peanuts, The Far Side and Calvin & Hobbes.
  73. …Whole Foods is one of the best places to meet attractive singles in New York City. Better than a bar.
  74. …Fall is the best season because you actually can dress for it and it doesn’t rain as much as it does in Spring.
  75. …If you are constantly talking to your friends and family about your relationship problems but not to your significant other about your relationship problems, break up.
  76. …Despite the advancements in birth control, you probably shouldn’t sleep with someone you couldn’t stand to be a part of your life forever. You never know.
  77. …You shouldn’t even think about getting married to someone if you can’t sit in a room with them and not say anything to one another and not be bothered by that fact.
  78. …You should be allowed to slap guys who have their polo collars popped.
  79. …Monica should not have been able to afford that apartment on Friends. I don’t care if it was rent stabilized. Rachel and her weren’t consistently employed for the first six seasons.
  80. …It’s a cliche to say but Aquaman really was the lamest Justice Leaguer.
  81. …”Bennifer” ruined Ben Affleck’s career but Jennifer Lopez seemed to escape with only a few scratches.
  82. …Kevin Smith peaked too soon with Chasing Amy.
  83. Futurama should have been saved instead of Family Guy.
  84. …You shouldn’t date your friends unless the basis of your friendship was mutual attraction therefore making your friendship a trial run at dating.
  85. DuckTales was the best Disney after school cartoon.
  86. …Relationships with coworkers always end poorly.
  87. …The A Nightmare On Elm Street franchise was ruined when they decided that Freddy Kreuger should be funny.
  88. …The biggest problem with US sitcoms is that they never know when to end. If every show had a five season plan that they stuck to, even if it was a high rated show, the quality of television would improve.
  89. …Kids shouldn’t be allowed to read Cosmopolitan and Maxim and magazines like that until they are 18.
  90. …If you could get quality vegetarian dishes at McDonald’s prices, there would be more vegetarians.
  91. …Crash (over Brokeback Mountain) was the most ridiculous Academy Award winner for Best Picture in the last 10 years followed by Shakespeare In Love (over Saving Private Ryan).
  92. …Quentin Tarantino abuses the N word in his movies but he’s not as bad as Martin Scorsese who has an affinity for racist characters.
  93. …All of Wes Anderson’s movies feel like they are taking place at the same time, in the same world, just in different parts of town.
  94. …Lebron James is the future of the NBA but he won’t win a title with the Cleveland Cavaliers before his contract is up.
  95. …The future presented in Mike Judge’s Idiocracy doesn’t seem that improbable.
  96. …Paparazzi are the scum of the Earth.
  97. …Superman flying around the world to save Lois Lane was the worst deus ex machina ever filmed.
  98. …If your name ends in “-quita,” your parents have cursed you with a social disadvantage.
  99. …It’s harder to find someone you actually want to hold hands with than it is someone to sleep with.
  100. …There has been a song written for every matter of the heart.

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6 thoughts on “100 Opinions I Hold That Are Open To Discussion

  1. I don’t think movies have gotten too long; I just think the quality of writing and/or direction has declined significantly over the past 20 years or so. If you look at movies made in the 60s or 70s, a good number of the classics were well over 2 hours, and many were without the benefit of special effects, gun fights, car chases, etc. that define the vast majority of today’s ‘blockbusters.’ Take a look at the Godfather movies (not the third), Apocalypse Now, and the like and what you have are amazing, deliberately paced films with not a whole hell of a lot going on.

    But I think a lot of that comes not from the McG-induced ADD we approach films with nowadays. Could you imagine the Godfather 2 being made now? Do you think anyone in 2007 would sit through 20 minutes of Michael in the courtroom without the scene actually _advancing the plot_? People would be outraged! There would be anarchy in the aisles!

  2. I agree that movies generally suck and are made for an ADHD audience but the average length of movies when I was growing up was 90 minutes. 2 hours was considered a long movie. Spider-Man 3 shouldn’t be longer than Godfather II.

  3. Opinions that I disagreed with enough to comment:

    #17, I think Dawson was a lame pussy and didn’t deserve the girl in the end.

    #24, The Hurricane would have also been a better Oscar win for Denzel instead of Training Day

    #26, Carrie with Big was lame, but so was a show about empowered single women all ending up in relationships.

    #30, Protests used to make a difference, like in the 60’s, but now they don’t because people are to lazy to actually protest instead they do it online, which is virtual and therefore virtually useless

    #78, my brother popped his collar for a while, don’t smack him, it worked for him but it certainly doesn’t work for everyone.

    #85, Tailspin was pretty damn good too, but Goof Troop sucked. P.S. I definitely still have the DuckTales Egypt movie, the one where they find the genie on VHS.

    #91, I didn’t like Saving Private Ryan (and don’t say it’s because I’m a girl and don’t like war movies, not true). Also I think Tom Stoppard who wrote Shakespeare in Love is a genius. And this wouldn’t really help with your Crash/Brokeback upset but I still think they should create 2 categories at the Oscars, Best Picture-Drama and Best Picture-Comedy.

    So there.

  4. Yowzerz…incredible list. I agree with so much … and have commentary on a few items …

    “14. …The reason some guys can’t commit a relationship is they are always thinking about what else they can be doing. It’s like being a quarterback. One receiver is WIDE OPEN but you still check your other receivers to see if you can slip a pass in there.” Wow — I feel shamed but you just described my entire dating life with that one silly football analogy. I hate myself a little bit, but I understand myself better.

    “19. …The only friends worth keeping are the ones you can not talk to for long periods of time and nothing changes.” Which probably explains why after making new “friends” all the time, at the end of each year, the friend base remains the same size …

    “31. …The biggest mistake Marvel Comics made was bringing Jean Grey back from the dead.” I don’t know about that. It made sense at the time, sort-of. I guess that bothers me less, mistake-wise, than … Spider-Man clones, Heroes Reborn and Greedo shooting first (oh, wait, that’s not supposed to be there)…

    “51. …People who think they are special because they don’t want an iPod are douches.” I don’t think I’m special. I’m just cheap.

    “67. …Living a long boring life is the worst way to die, followed closely by drowning and suffocating.” Amen.

    “73. …Whole Foods is one of the best places to meet attractive singles in New York City. Better than a bar.” I think this goes for any city.

    “84. …You shouldn’t date your friends unless the basis of your friendship was mutual attraction therefore making your friendship a trial run at dating.” See No. 14. Maybe THAT’s why I don’t have long-standing new friends …

    “90. …If you could get quality vegetarian dishes at McDonald’s prices, there would be more vegetarians.” See No. 51. This is why I’m too broke to buy an iPod.

    “95. …The future presented in Mike Judge’s Idiocracy doesn’t seem that improbable.” True, and it makes me really sad. And scared.

    “99. …It’s harder to find someone you actually want to hold hands with than it is someone to sleep with.” OK, you’ve just summed up all of my dating qualms in one curt blog entry.

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