No one tells you how lonely unemployment can be. I don’t think I noticed before because Cindy’s work hours used to be more flexible. Since she started her new job a few months ago and has started working 9-5 hours, my days have become increasingly isolated.
Even though I didn’t make many lasting friendships at my last job, they were a part of my life that I didn’t notice until it was gone. They were the ones who I talked about sports with or what movies I may have seen that weekend. I had a coworker who had similar music tastes as me and we’d talk about new albums or shows going on around Los Angeles. There was a Red Sox fan who I sought out whenever the Yankees beat them. He was also a Cowboys fan so I even got to rub it in during the football season. Sometimes, there would be a Lakers game on in the kitchen TV and we would find excuses to congregate there. When I finally got laid off, one of the first things that pissed me off is that I wouldn’t be able to go into work after the Giants won the Super Bowl and talk shit.
When Cindy goes to work in the morning, there are days where I don’t speak again until she gets home. When I do have conversations, it’s either people calling me about jobs I applied to or calling vendors about the wedding. Sometimes, one of the guys at the gym will throw an acknowledgement my way but it’s usually in reference to a sports jersey I’m wearing or a funny t-shirt I have on. I still have instant messages with my friends throughout the day but it’s not the same. Plus, odds are those people are busy1. They have jobs.
I really shouldn’t complain though. I’m not much of a conversationalist these days anyway. The only things I have to talk about are wedding planning or being unemployed. Maybe it’s best that I have no one to talk to throughout the day. I don’t have much to say.
1. I know. I know. I’m annoying. I apologize.